5 Things About Makeup I DON’T Like, That Most People Do!

Watching YouTube videos, after YouTube videos, you’re almost conditioned into liking trends, products and techniques. We can all agree blindly hopping onto a bandwagon just because a YouTuber told us to, is not something we want to do, although we may appreciate the opinion of some. Beauty YouTubers get my eyes rolling, A LOT! I, in fact, have roasted beauty YouTubers in the past (go ahead, read it here and here, laugh).

But YouTube isn’t the demon here. I love YouTube. I love watching makeup videos, I love people caking on foundation and concealers on their face. Watching makeup being blended out with a makeup sponge is my visual therapy. It steadies my heart rate and brings down my stress levels. NO KIDDING!

I digress, anyway, there are certain, universally loved things/trends/products in makeup that make me go……..

Image from Giphy.com

All of these are norms by this point in the beauty industry and…… ummmmm……, you know what, just come along and I’ll explain.

 

These are in no particular order.

 

1. Highlighter

Yes, I DON’T LIKE HIGHLIGHTERS!

No, I am not specifically talking about the blinding trend on YouTube and Instagram these days.

NO, I don’t even like highlighting concealers!!!!

I especially hate it when MUAs go three or four shades lighter to conceal the under-eye area and to highlight! It works on lighter skin tones. On darker skin tone it looks FAKE! I prefer an even skin tone and I try to match the under-eye concealer or go, AT MOST, half a shade lighter. I find that on deeper skin tones, the eyes pop a little more when the under-eyes are not so overtly highlighted.

Alas, when doing stage makeup I can’t step away from it.

So it goes without saying that I also don’t care for shimmery highlighters. I have 2 highlighters both of which I didn’t purchase myself. Everything else is part of a palette in which I actually wanted the other shades in it instead of the highlighter.

I DON’T LIKE HIGHLIGHTERS!!!!!!!

 

2. Holographic anything

Anyone else get a headache with all these holographic packaging and highlighters!

Just me then.

ERGGHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

NO, I AM NOT KIDDING! This isn’t even the cynical me talking. This is not even satire!

I actually, PHYSICALLY get a headache!!!! It even makes me a little anxious!

NO!!!!!

PASS!!!!

 

3. The phrase “Holy Grail”

If you have one for 10 years, that’s a holy grail.

If it changes every year, please STFU!!!!!!!!!

“HOLY GRAIL” MY FOOT!!!!!!!!!!!

I find it so cliche. Everytime someone says this is my holy grail, it means they discount all possible products available in the market and no ONE person could have had used it all!

I have tried using the phrase and in my head I go, “YOU SOUND STUPID!”

 

4. Waterproof mascara

I know some of you are going……..

Yes, ladies and gentlemen. Part of why you don’t really see me reviewing waterproof mascaras, not ones that are hard to remove anyway, is because I don’t like them!!!

If I am using mascara, not a single drop of tear is coming out of my eyeballs nor is sweat coming ANYWHERE close to them!

I don’t cry at weddings because you don’t when you attend Indian weddings. You just laugh and the rest of the time get stressed trying to answer relatives asking about your marriage status (that’s a whole other conversation!!!).

I don’t wear makeup if I know I am going to sweat. ONLY exception being stage makeup! And even then, my waterproof mascaras are ones that come off with just water.

I DON’T LIKE WATERPROOF MASCARAS!

 

5. Online makeup shopping

This fittingly makes me the cavemen of the 21st century.

I have, of course, shopped online before, but every time I did (which you can count with both hands), I get a tiny panic attack after payment! WILL I be the victim of the dreaded product shattered and broken nightmare??!!!!

I have even said this on my blog. I don’t like online shopping and will only condone it when there are no other options! I want to touch, feel, swatch, hold, caress, look, compare, purchase and carry it out of the shop, safely in my hands!!!

If you really are concerned for me, then imagine me doing this.

Image from Tumblr.

NO, not the laughing face, the bitch face!

 

I hope you enjoyed reading!

Advertisements

Let’s Bash Some PR Morons!

I may lose some valuable future PR packages/interactions/money but hey, I gotta do this! I WANT to do this!

I am a beauty blogger in Southeast Asia, Malaysia, a country where beauty influencers aren’t as saturated as it would be in a purchasing powerhouse like the USA. There are also people here that do not even understand the concept of a beauty blog; educated people!

To the best of my knowledge, I am the only male beauty blogger in Malaysia whose blog is predominantly makeup related. So, this small, almost inconspicuous corner on the Internet amounting to this minuscule little blog called FiercePaint, does, surprisingly, get more than its fair share of attention from company PR representatives.

You see, when companies are professional and contact me to offer free products, cash in exchange for a review or something to that likeness, they are zealously welcomed!!! It is when these PR personnel, go above and beyond to do their job that simply pisses me off! Oh the sneaky underhanded maneuvers these blood sucking demonic spawn representatives employ to share in on the little views I get- if only retribution was instant gratification!

(Granted, some people do not put in as much effort as some of us do but get, unduly, more views and followers. YES! I have deliberately digressed to roast “bloggers”. Quotation marked to allow your very own personalised interpretation of these words. Life isn’t fair; I have come to terms with that! That does not mean I have to shut up about it! *eyebrow raise* If you felt heat from this paragraph, well……………)

.

.

.

.

.

.

Dubious methods some company PR personnel employ, don’t just annoy me, it flat out makes me angry!!! If a company condones such devious techniques then I am going to dissociate myself from them whether or not stakeholders are in the know of such asinine decisions.

 

It has happened before.

And I speak with evidence!

Please spare a few moments to read and examine attached text below.

dumbprcomment

Outsource getting more followers? I don’t even get help to take pictures! Everything is self taught!

Even then, this is much less offensive compared to the next one only because this person, or company, or whatever else this particular account represents, has directed it to me.

On to Exhibit B.

Ladies, gentlemen, and every other gender option!

BEHOLD. IDIOCY EPITOMISED!

anotherdumbpr

You’re not even speaking to me anymore! You are speaking to my readers!!! What am I then? The sideshow freak that no one stops to look at because I’m not weird enough?

Let me also disclose the fact that this is a VERY well reputed company not just in Malaysia but several other countries in ASIA! YES! Safe to say that I HAVE NOT worked with them and WILL NEVER!

Now, I direct this to the person who sat down behind the computer and did this;

Dear homo sapien with the capacity of decision making lower than that of an amoeba,

If you are reading this,

YOU ARE IRREVOCABLY and IRREDEEMABLY DIM-WITTED if you had even the tiniest inkling of hope that this was going to be welcomed!!!

Anyway my rage has fueled but only a post because comments get moderated and there’s this wonderful option called delete and trash!

OR ELSE……………

*cue jaws music*